Do It Mother

Correct. Ill take two.

Sun, 09 Aug 2009 14:25:41 +0100

Correct. Ill take two.

For Ms Nilon courtesy of the late poet D Joy.

Tue, 04 Aug 2009 14:52:07 +0100

For Ms Nilon courtesy of the late poet D Joy.

Conan! What Is Best In Life?

Mon, 03 Aug 2009 17:56:51 +0100

Conan! What Is Best In Life?

Satire.

Thu, 30 Jul 2009 14:47:29 +0100

Satire.

XKCD once again nails my life almost entirely. Oh that Batman!

Wed, 29 Jul 2009 10:04:33 +0100

XKCD once again nails my life almost entirely. Oh that Batman!

Make your fucking mind up, already…

Tue, 28 Jul 2009 10:34:09 +0100

Make your fucking mind up, already…

“I could’ve killed your wife then…”

Tue, 28 Jul 2009 10:32:35 +0100

“I could’ve killed your wife then…”

The Sound Of 27/07/09

Mon, 27 Jul 2009 13:10:47 +0100

A new thing.

Every Monday, I’m going to compile 10 tracks that I’ve been listening to which have defined the week previous for me. Some new songs, some old songs. Many different styles. Partly done as an audio diary, partly done to share new music with the few interested souls that follow this blog.

Its over here if you fancy it.

There’s classic electronica from 1994, unusual mouth sounds, a brass band version of a song you probably think you hate, insanely upbeat pop music about cricket, some rather beautiful instrumentals and a lo-fi acoustic song about a computer game character from a computer game I have never actually played. 40 minutes of potentially new and exciting music. You probably wont like it all. You might not like any of it. But enjoy the ride. I hope you find it incred.

http://www.sendspace.com/file/ffc7hy

Princess Diana’s death was foreshadowed in the work of...

Thu, 16 Jul 2009 16:46:13 +0100

Princess Diana’s death was foreshadowed in the work of Morrissey. This video presents a sample of the “best” evidence….

Return But Don't Remain

Mon, 13 Jul 2009 13:51:00 +0100

I finally did the obvious and deleted Facebook this weekend as I’m just sick to the back teeth of the time it sucks from me on a daily basis plus the endless whittering of those I don’t especially care about putting me into fouler and fouler moods. I’ll be avoiding Twitter too thanks to the opportunities it provides for yet more pointless arguments over nothing with increasingly boring self-obsessed people.

Ultimately, I’m tired, I’m lonely and I’m finding it harder to find reasons to care. More importantly, I don’t want you to have to care. Not doing something because it’ll upset my parents and about 5 other people is noble enough for now I suppose. But you really shouldn’t have to worry.

So I return to my hiding place with stories and ideas. Maybe one of them will lead to something. Until then, the same outdated lyric rolls over and over in my head…

And you’re full of facts but not things that could add up to words
You think about meaning more as an after word
As in afterward

It’s the only way I feel safe.

Although I also like the Perry Bible Fellowship….

Sun, 12 Jul 2009 19:12:00 +0100

Although I also like the Perry Bible Fellowship….

It would be fair to say I have now got xkcd…

Sun, 12 Jul 2009 12:54:38 +0100

It would be fair to say I have now *got* xkcd…

Kid British - “Our House Is Dadless”...

Sun, 12 Jul 2009 12:53:39 +0100

Kid British - “Our House Is Dadless” http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ltPxz4PinDA Still absolutely adoring this, Madness sample an’ all. Gawd bless those boys.

Screw you Comic Con jerks. I want one of these.

Sun, 12 Jul 2009 12:50:49 +0100

Screw you Comic Con jerks. I want one of these.

Do you remember the nineties?

Fri, 10 Jul 2009 22:22:43 +0100

Do you remember the nineties?

Calling all Half Man Half Biscuit fans! I made this prime...

Wed, 08 Jul 2009 11:51:27 +0100

Calling all Half Man Half Biscuit fans! I made this prime beginner’s guide to HMHB for someone with genuinely no knowledge of them and likes their rock and pops. What do you reckon?

“WOT? NO VISITOR FOR MR EDMONDS?!?!?!?”

I reckon its about time a few of us got it together and tried to...

Fri, 03 Jul 2009 12:46:00 +0100

I reckon its about time a few of us got it together and tried to get together a near as complete Frank Sidebottom music collection in mp3 format. You know it is. It really is. Anyone fancy helping?

Outdoor Minor

Fri, 03 Jul 2009 11:00:08 +0100

[The following is some stream of consciousness brain scraping to try and make sense of some idiot hole last night. Bear with me.]

So I went out and had a quite unexpected but really enjoyable night out with a few friends last night, only marred by less than 20 minutes after arriving someone threatening to kick my head in because I’d said I was going to grab their testicles. To be fair, I did, but in a very clearly jokey manner assuming it would be seen as such after the guy came over the hug my friend and practically shoved me into the wall getting to her. So I said “I’m alright cheers, feller. I wont have a hug.” Said bloke did not respond bar a glare. There was an uncomfortable silence which I foolishly decided to break as I nervously stammered out “Ill just have a go on your balls instead”.

It would be fair to say this did not go down well and despite apologising was bawled out by this admittedly well-refreshed dick-end for three minutes even with everyone around him obviously knowing it was a dumb gag and saying as such to him. “Oh no, its proper funny isn’t it to go round saying you’re going to grab a bloke’s balls”, he spat at me. “Well, as long as you don’t actually do it. Yeah, it is to be honest.”

Said gobshite then fucked off and my friends (and friends of friends who didn’t know me but now assumed me to be some sort of fat speccy sociopath, which lets be honest isn’t wide of the mark…) all turned to me with a “What the fuck?” expression. Or just saying it. That worked too. Nonetheless, it was soon forgotten about and times was had. This was in the beer garden (read: a yard) which I’d never really spent much time in before and from my decade of using the Red Pig was probably only the second time I’ve had any bother. Strange days but all behind me now.

And then this bloke came back. With a mate.

They proceeded to stand behind where we were all congregating and have another beer. I did the only natural thing and ignored the gorm who I’m not even sure would’ve remembered who he’d had a ‘to do’ with an hour earlier. After ten minutes, he walked over to another part of the yard and disappeared some time after, although I didn’t clock it myself. Whether he’d come back for a scrap or whatever, I don’t know. I hope I never do.

Its a shame I have to live in such a violent town because I couldn’t be less in that nature if I tried and that whole event has put me off going out and standing in the beer garden more often - not through fear - obviously there is some reasonableness in not wanting to be smashed in the face by a pissed up lunatic in a Fred Perry shirt. I just really don’t need to invite that shit into my life but at the same time, I refuse to be the quiet wallflower who never really pipes up - ironically because I am unspeakably shy and its my coping mechanism in that sort of situation.

Its clearly bothered me enough to write this although I suspect few of you have bothered beyond the opening paragraph, which is understandable. I’m supposed to go out again tonight. Same place. Same garden.

Would you?

Just Impolite - Episode Six Download It Here - In this final...

Thu, 02 Jul 2009 19:54:12 +0100

Just Impolite - Episode Six

Download It Here - In this final edition of Just Impolite: ITV pay tribute to the King Of Pop! The latest and best greeting card messages on the market! Have homosexual sex in India free of charge! The fatty fat people get out of control! Listen to Radio 4’s antidote to humour “I’m Sorry I Appear To Have Shat On The Floor”! More hot Just Impolite Wimbledon News Action News Roundup! The 69p Challenge! And everybody’s favourite space hero is back. No not that one. The other guy…

Plus one very dirty word. Well, it is the series finale…

Achewood gets it completely and utterly right once more.

Mon, 29 Jun 2009 10:00:27 +0100

Achewood gets it completely and utterly right once more.

Do It Mother

Correct. Ill take two.

For Ms Nilon courtesy of the late poet D Joy.

Conan! What Is Best In Life?

Satire.

XKCD once again nails my life almost entirely. Oh that Batman!

Make your fucking mind up, already…

“I could’ve killed your wife then…”

The Sound Of 27/07/09

Princess Diana’s death was foreshadowed in the work of...

Return But Don't Remain

Although I also like the Perry Bible Fellowship….

It would be fair to say I have now *got* xkcd…

Kid British - “Our House Is Dadless”...

Screw you Comic Con jerks. I want one of these.

Do you remember the nineties?

Calling all Half Man Half Biscuit fans! I made this prime...

I reckon its about time a few of us got it together and tried to...

Outdoor Minor

Just Impolite - Episode Six Download It Here - In this final...

Achewood gets it completely and utterly right once more.

It would be fair to say I have now got xkcd…